5 Sales Skills to Overcome Career Depression & Revive Your Success

Hello and welcome to the show. Are you facing career depression or depression in your business? I'm sure you're wondering if sales skills can be helpful. And the answer is yes, they are helpful in situations where you're feeling uninspired, where you're feeling not motivated, where you're feeling potentially depressed. So I'm here today to to share some sales skills that can help if this is your quandary. Well, First off, I've mentioned in previous episodes that salespeople have to face a lot of rejection.

They have to face a lot of rejection because nobody wants to be sold. We're often talking to strangers and we're often in socially in potentially socially awkward situations. So those of us who have made a career out of selling, we are constantly being rejected and we have to build quite a bit of resilience for some of you who are not used to the constant batter, the constant battering and the constant rejection. You know, when you're facing hostile situations in the workplace or you feel like you're being personally rejected, these are some of the things that can lead to some people feeling depressed.

Oh, First off, let me clarify. I'm not a mental health professional, so I'm not talking about people who have severe diagnosed medical, medical depression. I'm talking about situations where you're an ordinary person, things have not been too smooth in the office and you feel like you might be depressed. I'm talking about people who are self diagnosing themselves that they feel they are depressed. For people who have received a confirmed medical clinical diagnosis of depression, that's a whole ball game, different ball game altogether.

So you shouldn't be listening to this podcast for advice, but you know how it is in Nigerno. You know, there's UPS, there's downs. Sometimes you feel good, sometimes you feel bad. So I'm talking about these kind of everyday situations. So because sales people are faced with rejection all the time, by necessity, we need to look for ways of coping with rejection, building some resilience and then looking at things as learning opportunities.

Because when people reject me in business, first of all I have to realize that it's not me personally who is being rejected. So I'm not taking things personal that's going to help at work. What is being rejected in a sales context is the value proposition that I am bringing to the table, the solution that I'm bringing to the table. And so if you're facing some rejection, you're facing some issues because of some initiatives that you're trying to put on the table at work or some departmental project or things like that.

Sometimes it is not about you per SE, but because of hostility that people have towards the idea. So don't take this thing personal. Then sales people, we try to make everything a learning opportunity because it's only when we learn from the situation that we're going to know how to overcome it when we come across it in another situation. So you need to develop question asking skills. You need to be able to talk to the person who's on the other end of the design.

Sorry, the divide to try and figure out what it is that is going on. You know, simple conversation like hey, I got Victor how far now it's like you don't want to agree for me this year, 2024, last meeting I said this, you said this. I see A, you say B like Victor, how far now what's happening? You see that you don't like me and then you keep quiet and you listen. And Victor, well, if he says that it's you that is the problem, OK, then maybe both of you need to go and see human resources because you shouldn't tolerate bullying in the workplace and things like that.

But if he says my brother, it's not you. But how can he be saying this kind of thing? This thing doesn't make sense. Now. In 2021, this is what we did. It led to this in 2023, it led to this 2024, it led to that you start seeing things from Orga Victor's point of view. And you say that, OK, maybe your idea is not as well thought or as well thought out as you thought in the first place. So you might have to revisit this.

You might have to revisit that. But either way, from having these kinds of conversations with people who are adversarial with you in the office, you might be able to improve the proposal, you know, change that departmental initiative or whatever it is that you want to do, might be able to tweak it and get better buying because you're exercising a little bit of resilience. You're looking at things as learning opportunities and you're trying to overcome objections and to build some buy in when you're dealing with people.

So that can help getting some resilience around rejection. Then another sales skill or attribute is the whole thing around goal oriented, being goal oriented and that's because sales people we only eat what we kill. So if I don't bring in any business in January, I'm not going to get paid in February. If I don't do any marketing January, February, March, then no business is going to come in April, May, June, July. That's just how it works.

So sales people, we have to be self motivated, we have to be goal oriented and one trick that we use to keep ourselves going is we celebrate outcomes. So early on, you know early on as a young man, you know as a as a newlywed, you know actually do stuff like that. So money comes in feeling good on the way back home. Just buy Shama for me and buy Shama for Wifey. That was back when we see lots of Shama. Right now. Right now, quite frankly, the doctor says we shouldn't be eating Shama.

Let's just put it that way. But anyway, back in the day, you know, just simple stuff that you do so you can find ways of celebrating outcomes as well. You know this thing works out. This is how you pamper yourself. This thing pulls through. This is how you pamper yourself. This is how you celebrate little stuff. It doesn't have to be buying Shama, even if it's just celebrating on your WhatsApp status or whatever, or coming home quickly to share with your spouse, your boyfriend, your girlfriend, your significant other.

We need to look for ways for celebrating outcomes, because when things work out in our favour and we celebrate it today, it gives us some oomph and some power. Some pull through to continue through next week or next month. When things don't even be looking that good, then another sale, skill or attribute is the thing around relationship building. You can't build relationships without trust. You can't build relationships without rapport, and you can't build either without finding commonalities with people that you have.

So in the business context or in the office, if you're having issues with Olga Victor or Madam Victoria or or Kunle or or Sister Kilechi or whatever, you need to find ways of building trust and rapport with these people. Have conversations. Ask questions, Talk about this other person. Try and build some, Explore some commonality. I mean, it might help. By the end of the day, if while you and Olga Victor are chatting or you and Madam Victoria are chatting, you find out that you know your mother's are from the same village or something like that.

You know, I mean, you never know. These things help and they come in handy in the weirdest sorts of ways. Because I finished from Saint Gregory's. That was my secondary school, St. Gregory's College SW Ikoi. That's how we like to say to keep a touch. Some of you might say it's a lie. You guys finish from mobile India. So whether it's mobile India or Southwest equal you. That's beside the point. And it's something that comes up time and time again.

Enter into a room, you know this talk and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And then the whole thing of Greg's come up and like, hey, up Greg's up school. And then all of a sudden me, a young man who is in 30s and 40s now has something in common with Ogre that I'm talking to and I'm trying to get some business done. And our guy is in his 50s and 60s, maybe 70s. Just that simple thing of Up Greg's Up school. It doesn't matter that I

attended Greg's in Southwest, Ecoy in Lagos. He might have attended Greg's in the same location much, much earlier, decades earlier. Or maybe the Greg's location that we have in the East. You know, so simple commonality and all of a sudden there's something joining this young man with the older gentleman. So these things help. Look for ways that you can build trust and rapport around the office. It's going to help when you're facing those situations when it looks like people are attacking you.

They don't want to hear what your initiative is. They're not allowing you to talk at office meetings, you know, blah, blah, blah, stuff like that. So you should be trying to build community and connection. Now, some of you might say some of these things that I'm bringing up are very unfair because it's putting the onus on you. And yes, unfortunately, yes, the owners has to be you. Remember I said that if you're in a situation where Olga Victor or Madam Victoria says yes, you are the problem.

I'm tired of you, Gen. Z, I'm tired of you this, I'm tired of you that, blah, blah, blah, then you guys need to go and see HR. You know, that's that's another matter entirely. So there's situations where you have to involve HR. Well, God forbid, maybe you might have to involve the police if your life is being threatened or whatever. But most of the times you will have to take the initiative to fix these things, because after all, you are the one who's trying to put forward this initiative.

You're the one who's trying to get things that are going. So is it unfair that you should take the initiative? I don't know. But truth of matter is Olga Victor or Madam Vic, who's not going to bend over backward and present whatever it is that you need from the departmental meeting and you know or what not. I mean, if they do that and God has touched their heart again, that's fine, That's all well and good. So yes, of course we should pray that God should make things smooth in business and smooth at work, but then we should also take the initiative to try and get things done.

Because like the old Muslim proverb says, trust in Allah must still tie your camel. So you trust in God, but you still do your own bit. And then from what I've said so far, I'm sure you guys can say that there's a certain level of continuous learning that is involved and that is necessary in all this. So you should be continuously improving yourself. Make sure that you're the subject matter expert in the department. So let's say you're working Zenith Bank and you're in forage department and stuff like that.

It would help if you are the absolute pro when it comes to Forex issues, so that if Madam Victoria says this or if Orga Victor says this, you can talk with your full chess and say no. Actually, Orga Victor, what you're saying is what applied in 2021. This is Chinubu's regime. Chinubu came in on so, so, so and so. And with the new CBN governor, they released this directive, paragraph, this subset that that says that now this is the real issue.

Why don't you say it like that? Because you're the pro on Forex. Things you work in, Send it back organ. Victor has to keep quiet. Madam, Victoria has to keep quiet. At the very least they have to go and say, OK, you know what, let us check and confirm that you said is correct. But if you're the absolute subject matter expert, people can't toss you around. You know what you're talking about. Once you've spoken, you've spoken and you'll either check out or not.

If he checks out today, then best believe next week at the department health meeting. If you Give your opinion, people will listen. At some point people will be saying, you know what, Everybody has spoken, but we haven't heard from chichi. We haven't heard from Kelichi. Kelichi, how far now? What do you think? This is what this person has said, This one has. This is what that person has said. Chichi was your own opinion.

After a while people are going to start asking your own opinion. So continuous learning absolutely important now. The side effect of continuous learning is this. You become more engaged. You become more motivated. You become more excited at work or in business and dealing with people and the challenges that you face. Now before I wrap up, remember I gave a warning at the beginning and I'm repeating it again. This is for people who are self diagnosing and who thinks Oh well you know what, it's been a rough 2-3 weeks.

I think I'm depressed. These are the people that I'm talking to today. If you have severe depression, especially if it has been diagnosed, you spoken to a doctor before, you spoken a psychiatrist before or maybe your family members think that man, there's something serious that is going on. This does not apply to you if you are that part of that kind of person. If I let me talk about my own personal experience and that's the reason why I think these sorts of skills are come in handy.

When I was a lot younger, there was a time when I thought I was depressed. So I went to the doctor. I told him, like Doc, I beg help me, I'm impressed. And we had a conversation and the doctor said, oh, a young man, don't worry, you're not depressed. And I said, how do you know? And he said, you're not depressed because people who are depressed, for them, the sun never rises. Well, we're talking using metaphors of sun and clouds and things like that.

You know, I was talking about having a cloud over here and everything. And when he put it that way, I understood what he was saying that yes, for me, dark clouds come and things seem unclear. But tomorrow, the sun always rises. The sun always shines. And I'm like, OK, OK, OK, OK yeah, Yeah. I can run it like this. I can run it like this. I can run it like that. There are some people for them that that dark cloud never rises.

Today darkness tomorrow darkness. They never wake up. And it's like, oh, OK, I can see the sunshine somewhere behind the clouds. You know, heaven is waiting for me. I mean, for those of you who listen to R Kelly, you know that song Storm is over. I'm sure you jazzy. I wonder what's this guy quoting. Just check it. Storm is over. Robert Kelly. Yeah, nice song. Cool song. Was soundtrack for Space Jam. Now, Michael Jordan movie where he play basketball against the aliens.

He played with Bugs Bunny. And anyway, that's a long story. Where was that? Uh, huh. Yes. So that's my own personal history. I went and I spoke to the doctor and the doctor said, young man, you don't have a problem because for you, the sun rises again and you're able to pick yourself up. I was like, OK, yeah, yeah, I understood. And so in my own case, it was just simple stuff, you know, around the diet and exercise. While picking up exercise again,

'cause once I left university, I became lazy. I stopped exercising, you know, so just simple stuff, exercise, diet, you know, blah blah, blah, rest. You know, nowadays we modern people, as in we don't sleep. You've had a long day. You come back, you say you want to relax, and then you put on Netflix or, you know, social media. You're on this. This is that. That before you know it is 1:00 AM You haven't slept. 2:00 AM,

you haven't slept. But then you have to wake up at 6:00 AM because the kids have to get to school. I mean, how are you going to function living on just four hours of sleep every single day for three months at a stretch? So there are folks like me and you listening right now who what you have is not really depression. Go and talk to doctor. Doctor tell you a young man, young woman, you don't have a problem. Eat right, exercise more.

Are you on social media or? I killed on social media at 10 AMI. Sleep, you know, sleep from 5:50 if I want. The doctor gave me this kind of magic pill. Do my stick at 9 AMI. Took it and nothing. Just cancelled me until 6:00 AM. As in I was gone, but the thing did the trick and asked the doctor, Hey, what drug did you give me? Say, young man? I'm not giving you. Why now? Because I give you. I know what happened. Now you start abusing these drugs.

So he didn't tell me what it is. Even if you told me what it was, I wouldn't tell you guys over here. So you can go and start abusing drugs. But bottom line is, I'm not talking about everyday ordinary people. I'm talking to everyday ordinary people. And put it that way. If you have a severe depression, you think something is wrong. Your husband has been telling you that, my dear, I'm not comfortable. You're looking like this.

You're looking like that then should go see a doctor. Or is the other way around. You're a man. Your wife is telling you like, look, honey, babe. I don't like the way you've been sleeping. I don't like you know, you're looking like this. You're doing like this. Go see your doctor. Seek professional help. There are resources available. If you work in Niger, you have a typical Nigerian employer. You work with the civil service.

I'm sure you're part of the NHIS scheme. I think it's NHIS. I keep getting confused because I think UK is NHS and then Nigeria is NHIS or the other way around. Share one is NHS, one is NHIS. Either way it's a National Insurance scheme where you can go and speak to a doctor. I'm not sure if mental health professionals are covered, but at least you'll be able to speak to the regular doctor for free. You don't have to pay that 10K

or 20K consultation. You just go there and say, hey doc, I beg. I'm feeling depressed though my life is falling well above me. Now that doctor might not be able to help you, but the doctor is going to be able to know enough to see if there's a problem here and it needs further investigation. So go see a doc if you're having severe depression. Seek professional help if you're a private. If you want to pay private government hospitals, it's available.

There was a time that I got picked up by Rd. Safety. I made a legal U-turn. You know those idiots? They actually helped me go and see a shrink. Let me go and see a psychiatrist to be sure that I'm not mad. And what I did was just illegal U-turn and you're taking me to go and see a shrink. Anyway, they bundled my car and I had to go and see the doctor. I didn't know we had mental health professionals in Niger. So it was Gareke was what's it called?

There's a hospital in Gareke in Abuja That is next to the cathedral. The cathedral, that's Area 3 or should I say is Area 8 or if you're familiar with Abuja, you know where it is, I'm saying. So I went there and yeah, the mental health professionals. So they had to look at me and write a report to Rd. Safety saying that I'm not mad, so I should just pay the fine. And then they, they release my car. So they paid the fine.

Oh, sorry, I paid the fine. Rather, they released the car. Although I was worried that the guy would say I was mad because, you know, I was dropping off the kids from school and you know how it is now. So you're just wearing singlet and boxers. Not not boxers, exactly, but I wasn't entirely presentable. I hadn't called my hair, my beard was looking rough. So when the doctor came I was like, this guy would look at me and say this guy is mad so.

But anyway, luckily he didn't say that I was a madman and I got my car back. So there are options that are available, whether under the nhis or whether private. So if you're in Lagos, go to General Hospital in the Keja and ask, you know, I don't know for sure, but I'm surprised if there are no resources that are there entirely. So go and ask at government hospital, you'll be able to pay. Not much. At the time that I went to karaoke, or rather I was conscripted by the Federal Rd.

Safety Corps, I should go. And those guys are mad. They're the ones that are the mad people anyway. So when they forced me to go there, I think it was 10K for consultation and that 10K lasts a month. That's multiple visits, so you can do it Anyway, let me just stop here. I've gone on for too long. So yeah, if you think you are depressed and there's little dark loud, then yes, there are sales skills that you can pick up from this podcast and other resources that are going to be able to help you see the sunshine and chase things for a better day.

But it looks like there's severe problems if mom sees complaining, your children are complaining, your husband is complaining, your wife is complaining, your girlfriend thinks is a problem, your boyfriend thinks is a problem, Go see a doctor and take it from there. So thank you very much for your time and attention. Remember to connect with me on LinkedIn. The name is Tarashima Ayidi. You can confirm the spelling of my name from the link where you're listening to this episode.

And also connect with me on WhatsApp. The phone number is 08064662140. The country code is +234 if you're hitting me up from outside the shores of Nigeria. So thanks for your time and attention. I'll catch you guys at the next recording.