Beyond the Buzzwords: How to Introduce Yourself So They Get It (and Want More!)

Hello and welcome to the show. I'm taking today's recording at my desk and the kids are home because today is Children's Day, so expect to hear some interruptions in the background. Now, this is your first time of listening to the podcasts. This is not a show about my family life. We're here to talk about free business education. We're talking about sales, marketing and all kinds of things business development related.

So this is your first time listening to the show. When we're done, please share, promote and talk about the show so that your friends and family members in Nigeria and abroad can benefit from the questions that we tackle. They can do that by subscribing on Spotify, YouTube, Apple or any player of their choice. And if you, dear listener, have any sales and marketing questions in particular, then bring them to me. You can call, you can SMS, you can WhatsApp me on 08064662140.

Now today on the show, we're going to explore some thoughts about how we talk about ourselves or how we introduce ourselves in a business context or how we describe our UVP. I remember on the show whenever you hear UVP, that just means unique value proposition. So when people outside talk about unique value proposition, what they mean is they are trying to say why should people do business with you? Essentially, that is what your unique value proposition is,

what makes you different, what makes you different from the next person. So if you're a fashion designer, your unique value proposition is the thing that sets you apart from the fashion designer who is in the next estate or who is in the next market stall or who is on the next Instagram handle. So essentially, that's what your UVP is. The way I like to look at it is your UVP just answers the question, why should someone do business with you?

Because there's a few 100 dozen or maybe 1000 people out there who do exactly the same thing you do. Why should anybody do business with you? That is your unique value proposition. So the only difference is when people outside talk about UVP, When I say outside, I mean people who are not members, people who don't listen to this show. What they think is you should sit down and come up with a good reason for why people should do business with you.

But if you're listening to this podcast right now, I always look at things from a sales and business development perspective and from a sales background. It usually is what the customers are telling us that we take to inform our UVP. Because if you have 10 customers, 8 of them are telling you the same thing, then whether you like it or not, that actually is your UVP. So you can now take that and make it a part of your sales and your market messaging.

So the reason why I want us to look at this today is because I received a WhatsApp message a few weeks ago. So let me just go ahead and read the message. And yes, I'm sorry, this is also another WhatsApp message. But don't worry, there are things that we can learn from it. And I'll give you guys a break for the next week before I come up with another WhatsApp episode. So this is the message that received and I'm going to read it.

So the message goes like this. Good evening, Sir. I just listened to some of your podcasts on Spotify and I must confess how amazing your tips and case studies are. Thank you for taking our time to put such invaluable information out there. I am XYZ, I'm an emotional response copywriter and an e-mail marketer slash copywriter. Kindly save my number as I hope to learn from you moving forward. Thank you XYZ scientist name.

So of course, I responded to the message telling the guy, thank you very much for reaching out because it's always a pleasure to hear from those of you who are podcast listeners. And I don't just say that anyhow, anyhow, because actually it is a joy and it's a good thing to hear from you guys because think about it, you must be putting out content in your business. And think about it, how many people actually reach out to you to say, oh, thank you very much for this thing that you put out.

So it is a rare privilege and I don't take it likely that you who listen to the podcast, you guys do reach out to me to say thank you very much, thank you, you're doing a good job or thank you very much. But this episode, you said I don't agree or this one I don't understand. So actually, I do value it when you guys do reach out. So I sent my usual response and then I asked the fellow a question about what an emotional copywriter means because to be honest, how could I put one or two together?

I'll figure it out. But The thing is, if this guy is telling me that he's an emotional copywriter, chances are that when he's reaching out to other people, he is telling them that he's an emotional copywriter. And the challenge that I have for him and for those of you who are using terms like this when you're reaching out to customers is do your customers, do other people, do other stakeholders know what you mean when you're using these terms?

So that's the response that I send. And then this is how he responded to my message. And I read an emotional response. Copywriter is one who writes to spark up people's interests and willingness to act. Almost immediately, he targets their emotions and leads them into the buying decision. It sounds a bit manipulative, but as far as I don't sell destructive products to them, they are safe. And yeah, it's nothing far from direct response marketing.

So that was his response. So now looking at this message or looking at the interaction between me and this guy, there are a few things that we can we can talk about, we can vibe about over here about how we about the market messaging that we use and how we present ourselves to strangers or how we introduce ourselves to strangers before we get a chance to get into a business conversation and before we get a chance to close the deal.

So we're going to be running through a few points that also one moment. OK, I'm sorry about that. The vibration came in because I forgot to mute my phone while recording because, you know, I make my podcast entirely from my phone. So this is your first time listening. Sorry about that. Well, I did say there will be some interruptions. So that's your first interruption of the day. So yeah, let's look at some main talking points that come out from the exchange between me and the fellow who are sending me a message.

So number one or first thing, you notice that the guest started off with the compliment. And I'll say here, complimenting is a good way to get attention, especially today. The reason why is because today everybody's doing plenty of cut and paste, copy and paste because people are trying to automate. But the side effect of complimenting someone is when you do it immediately shows the sender, sorry, the recipient, the person who is receiving the message.

It shows that you who are sending the message. You have done some work, you have done some research and then this outreach is tailor made to you or is relevant to you who is receiving the message. And these are the things that increase the chance of it being read. So let me repeat, I'm not saying that all of you should go out and start flattering or complimenting everybody you're sending messages to. But I'm just trying to let you understand the dynamic that the reason why I compliment compliments work nowadays is because everybody is trying to automate, is trying to copy and paste, is trying to broadcast 1,000,000 messages, or is trying to use AI to send out messages.

And so people are not reading messages like before. So the moment something comes and it seems to have a compliment that seems to be unique to me, I know for sure that is not something that was AI humour. You will also know that this thing is not AI. This thing is not copy and paste or even if it's copy and paste shy, the person did some small homework to at least personalize it and it might be relevant and then the person will read it or increase the chances that people might read it.

So I'm not saying go out and compliment everybody, but I am saying put in the work so that people can see or get the sense that the message is tailor made for them. That is not a copy and paste. Now does that mean we should be sending unique messages to everybody? No, I'm not saying that because if you do that, that will take a lot of time, but those are things we can talk about in a future episode. But this, I'm just letting you know that this is one thing that worked because there are people who reach out to me after listening to the podcast trying to sell me something or they have their own agenda and this is pure AI outreach.

They just told the bot or I write something or The thing is copy and paste or whatever. Those sorts of messages. I mean, I open and I see sometimes I read just so we can have case studies to discuss about over here on the podcast. A lot of times I just ignore them. But this one I read because the way it started was obvious. The guys listened to the show and it's tailor made to me then. Let's see. So now the main thing I was hinting at when I started today's episode is we should learn to reduce the amount of work that the reader or that the listener has to do in a business conversation.

Because there's a saying in sales, traditionally we say a confused mind does not make decisions. Let me repeat, traditionally in sales, we say a confused mind does not make decisions. In other words, you're talking to someone, you want them to buy your product or their service. If they're confused, they will say, let me think about it. Let me get back to you. Let me discuss with my wife. Let me discuss with my husband.

Let me talk to my parents. Let me call my pastor. Let me hear what my children want to say. Send it to my secretary. Send me a proposal, send me an e-mail. We'll be around guaranteed by 10:00 PM. If you are, come and drop the proposal on my desk. I'll look at it. I will get back to you. I am busy. Now let me finish with this contract. I'll get you hear all manner of excuse because a confused mind does not make decisions.

So when we are communicating with potential customers, although in this case, he's not communicating with a potential customer, he's just reaching out to tell me thank you. But The thing is, if he's reaching out to me and talking to me like this, I know that this is how he's talking to his customers. So if you're using terms that your customer does not understand, you are adding to the confusion. There are some people who say emotional copywriter.

What does that mean? But trust me, the average Nigerian is not going to ask you. They will hear your sales speech and they'll say, oh, OK, let me think about it. And you won't hear anything else from them. These are some of the reasons why when you make up words, an emotional copywriter is a made-up word. When you make up words, do so sparingly. Don't use it all the time. These words sound nice, but The thing is, your customer, your audience, your potential client does not know what these words mean.

In this case, emotional copywriter. I bet you the average client does not know what emotional copywriter means. Because I'm in this space, I can use 2 + 2 and figure it out. I know what the copywriter means. I know what emotional means. I can jam it together and understand what that means, even though I wasn't exactly sure. So that's the reason why I asked him. Let me not assume so. Even if so, if for someone like me I had to ask to be sure, Let me not misunderstand.

I bet you some of the prospective clients when they see Emotional Copywriter in their inbox, they have no idea what it means. Then let me see. So I made a note somewhere so I don't forget the stuff. OK, yes I have. So remember I was talking about him UVP at the beginning of the show. That's a unique value proposition and that is the reason why most people do business with you. So it's always a good idea when you're reaching out to people to throw your UVP out there, which is what he did.

I'm an emotional copywriter. So the reason why you throw your UVP, why you put your UVP out in your messaging is so that people will understand what you do. And they were either key in or they will leave. So let's assume that people understood what emotional copywriter means. If you put an emotional copywriter, the person who likes that kind of stuff is supposed to key in and continue to yarn with you. Or the person who hates that kind of thing is supposed to opt out and leave you alone.

So that is part of the reason why we put our unique value proposition out of there. But remember, we should try and say it in simple terms that they might understand. But if you can't speak of it in simple terms, try and explain your UVP in terms of the benefits that they will get. So instead of saying I am an emotional copywriter, you can say I OK, I should have come up with some examples before recording, OK. In this case, he said that he's an emotional copywriter.

OK, let me look at it this way. So let's see if we can come up with some examples of how you can clearly state your unique value proposition using this guy as a case study. So he said he's an emotional copywriter, and he explained what it means. So let's see how will I put it now? OK, so the way that he explained it, let me just paraphrase now, he explained an emotional response copywriter is someone who grabs people's attention and who makes them want to take action right away.

OK, so that is something that he could have included in his message, an emotional response copywriter. Then he could have defined it in the message. I grab people's attention and make them want to take action right away. Or you could have stated his unique value proposition as this. I write to quickly get people interested and get them to act. So you can see now that if he's writing in those terms, the person that he's writing to,

since he's a copywriter, his clients are going to be people who are business people who want copy. Copy just means text that you use in your marketing, in your sales, in your advertising. So people will now instead of just saying I'm an emotional response copywriter and you leave it at that. If you say I write to get people interested and to get them to act, any business owner can understand that or another will be saying something like, I'll put it OK, my goal is to capture people's attention and make them act immediately.

Any business owner who sees that will understand because business owners that is the kind of result that they are looking for. So if you are a copywriter and you're reaching out to somebody who sells Madras, for instance, the person who is selling Madras, whether on Instagram or whether he puts up a billboard or whether he's running an advertisement on the radio, he wants the advert to capture people's attention. And he wants people to act immediately by coming to the store or by calling or by, you know, doing XYZ.

So in this case saying my goal is to capture attention and make people act immediately. You can see that anybody would understand or you could have he could have also said I write words that makes customers interested, I make them buy your products. OK. I think that's a better way of putting out looking at it. So when he's reaching out to people and his UVP, he just says he describes his unique value proposition as I write words that make customers interested,

I make them buy your products. I mean, come on, which business owner is not going to understand that everybody will understand clearly. So if he speaks in this way to a potential customer, they're much more likely to understand what it is that he does as a copywriter. Instead of saying I'm an emotional copywriter, you can say I speak to your potential customer. Sorry. I write words that make your customers interested and make them buy your products.

So that way they'll understand because he is talking in terms of the results that people will get. So remember that when you're trying to describe your unique value proposition. If you talk in terms of results and you use simple language, your customers will understand. Now remember, if you're talking to technical people or people in your space, in this case, technical people will also include someone like me because you know, he's a copywriter, I'm a sales coach, business development consultant.

So where in similar space, if we use technical language, we understand ourselves. If I'm talking to him and I say UVPI don't need to explain. So when you're talking to technical people, oh that's fine, use all the fancy words you want, they will understand. But if I'm talking to a potential customer, I will never tell them UVP. I will start off by saying what's the reason why people do business with you? Then by the time we chat back and forth later on, I can introduce the term and say, OK,

the reason why I'm asking is because, you know, in business and in marketing, we need something called the UVP. This is what UVP means. So this has to be the hook. This has to be the main thing that we're going to be pushing out there in our marketing. So all the reason why I'm asking all these questions because I know I want to know the hook. Once we have the hook and we throw the hook out there, hopefully that's is the hook that we use.

And now hook people and put them in so that they can do business with us. But I won't start off a conversation with an ordinary person who could be my client and start talking about technical terms like this. But when you're talking to people in house, so from marketer to marketer, from salesperson to salesperson, yeah, you can be using all these terms. So, OK, yes, he also said something in the message about targeting people's emotions.

So I wanted to comment on that. So yes, as business people, we should be targeting people's emotions and lead them in to the buying decision. Yes, we should. But the problem is lots of people think we target people's emotions by doing flowery language, using emotional language. The way that we target people's emotions is not by using emotional language, it's by doing needs analysis or qualification and discovery. Because the process of need analysis or qualification and discovery is when we ask questions about the person,

about their problem, about their vision, about where they're heading to, about where they're running from, what they're running from, what they're running to. If we ask questions, it is then that we'll now start getting the emotional cues that we can lean upon. So back in my wedding photography days, if I was talking to a bride and we're talking and then she started saying that, oh, that during her sister's wedding, the photographer did this, the photographer did that, blah,

blah, blah. You can see that I'm now picking up on the emotional cues of what it is that is relevant and important to her because she noticed something that a photographer did during her sister's wedding. She either likes this kind of thing or she's afraid of this kind of thing. She wants to do this kind of thing, or she wants to avoid this other kind of thing. But it is only by asking questions about her, about her situation, about her context,

that I can get the emotional cues of what to lean in on. So it's not about me coming up with all kinds of flowery language saying, oh, the wedding is the best day of your life. Imagine the whatever, this is the beginning of tomorrow. This is the beginning of finally ever after. This is the something, something, something. This is the most beautiful day of your life. Yeah. Using all that emotional language is good. If you want to use it in your copy, all well and good.

You can. But just know that you would get the main emotional thing that you can lean in on when you do need analysis and you know exactly what is choking them, exactly what they love or exactly what is painting them. So have a conversation with people first. Do these analysis first. It is then that you will know what emotional cues that you can lean upon. But one more thing, you also need to ask questions. You also need to try and figure out the implication of what's going on here.

So like back my wedding photography days, if your bride said this and this and this and that, that, you know, it must be this, it must be this, it must be that. You know, I would ask that, OK, no problem. You want to do acrylic frame, but just in case. Well, right now acrylic frame is common. But back when I was doing photography, acrylic frame was very, very rare. And in fact, the acrylic frames I used to get, we had to import them from partners in America,

in Salt Lake City, in Utah, a Niger company over the photo. Niger. I think they're still in business, but they don't do business with Nigerian firms that much anymore because Nigerians are not really buying their product. So that's how I used to get my own acrylic frames. So back then, if the bride say I saw acrylic, it must be acrylic, it must be acrylic. You know, I'll ask. OK, sure, no problem. Yeah, we can do that for you,

blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. But just in case we can't get acrylic, would that be a problem or is there any alternative or all I put it, well, you get the sense of what it is I'm trying to say. I'm trying to get the implication, OK, it must be acrylic. That's what she says. But if we can't get acrylic, is that a, is that a deal breaker? Is that going to be a problem? How serious a problem is it going to be? Because I have noticed in the past that some clients tell you some things you assume is the main thing.

And then by the time you're done with the deal, you realize that, well, it was just a nice to have, so you just ended up stressing yourself unnecessarily. But The thing is, if you know what their hot buttons are, if you know what they love, what they're avoiding, what they're running to, and you know the implication of whether it is there or not, you now know whether this is a serious something or not a serious something.

And you now know whether that this is something that you can key upon in your market messaging or in your sales conversation. You know, when you're talking to these people, you now know if this is something you can stress upon or not. So if now the acrylic is a deal breaker and I can provide the acrylic and I'm the only one who happens to have the acrylic, remember now that's not the case because acrylic is common. You can't get the everywhere.

But back then it wasn't. So if I'm the only one I can now key in on that point, it is part of the unique value proposition in that particular instance. Now, the reason why they should go with me is because this beloved acrylic frame that she wants to do, which is 1 in town and which will make her images appear like this, like this and like that and like that, that this is precisely the reason why she should go with me.

And I know that I can lean on this and start making some emotional plays is because I've had the conversation and I know that it is a big deal for her. So these are how you tease out emotions in the sales and in the buying process. It's not in you sitting down beforehand and trying to come up with the most emotional words you can think of. Have a conversation with someone and know exactly what emotionally appeals to them.

What is it is that they like, what they are trying to avoid or what they are trying to achieve. That is where you will get all the emotional cues that you can lean on. Now, the guy also mentioned something in the message about none of this is manipulative. And yes, I want to comment on that because some of you are afraid of manipulating people in the sales process. I mean, like, look at all the things we're talking about now,

talking about emotions, how to key into emotions, how to emphasize some kinds of emotions that some of you right now who are feeling as if this is manipulative. I beg. I don't want to be 419. I don't want to be a Hulk star. I don't want to be forcing things on people. But realize this, none of this is manipulation. I know some of you are wondering how can I say that with a straight mouth, and I will say it again. None of this is manipulation because all of these things we're talking about is in the client's best interest.

This is what we call exercising influence. It is not manipulation. Manipulation is when you are coercing people or getting them to act, but you are getting them to act for your own benefit. Now you the seller's benefit, that is not what we're doing. We're getting them to act for their own benefit. If the babe really likes this acrylic and she thinks it's the best thing for her, then it's in her interest to do business with me.

But then again, if acrylic is the main thing for her and I can't provide it, the ethical thing to do actually is just to say, oh, babe, I'm Madam, I'm sorry, I'd love to work with you, but I can't supply this. And then you back out or refer her to someone else. But you can see that in this case, we're exercising some influence and we're trying to get them to take action because we will help them to achieve the reason why they reached out to us in the first place.

So when you exercise influence over someone and it is for their own benefit, that is not manipulation. Let me give you another example so that you can understand. Let me go into the personal space. All of us who are listening, OK, some of us have kids, some of us don't, but eventually most of us will have children. When we do, we will all exercise influence over our our children by getting them to go to school. There's no Nigerian parents now or no Nigerian parents to be who say school is up to you is optional.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no. At the very least you exercise influence over them so that they will do primary school. At the very least, I can say confidently that there's no Nigerian parent who say it's your choice. Shockingly, in America and in the UK, that's what parents are saying, it's your choice. Anyway, we were not there yet and I hope we don't get there. We educate all our kids to the best we can, that is exercising influence because we think them being educated is in their best interests so that they they can be able to function better in society and also to increase their prospects in career and in business.

That is exercising influence. But there are some parents who want their children maybe to get a PhD. But the reason why Mumsy or Popsy wants you to get PhD is because it will make them, the parents more respectable in Niger because you know how it is. Now, if you're the mother of a doctor, you know, when I say I mean doctor like you're the mother of a highly educated person. You know, it gives you some, some kind cred, some kind of reputation that yes, you're a good parent in that situation.

I have seen and I'm sure even you, you know, some of those people who are resisting the PhD and resisting the masters because they know very well that look, this masters or this PhD is mommy that wants me to do it. It is not what me I want to do. Now we're entering into the the levels of coercion or manipulation. It's because the child can see that, look, these masters, mommy, you want me to do this masters for any number of reasons, but it's not tied into my happiness.

It's not tied into my progress. It's not tied into what it is that I want to do. So that is the difference between manipulation and just exercising influence. When my wife and I were having this conversation because my wife doesn't agree, you know, she's a she's a lawyer and she's not marketing communication. So as far as she's concerned, all not manipulation. So this way I explain it to her that OK, look, baby, you understand, you see that girl in our son's class, I say, yes, I

think that kind of babe will make a Good Wife for our son and say, yeah, sure, sure. I agree. So I now say, OK, look at it this way. If when our son is old enough and I'll tell him to look married, this babe should be a Good Wife. It's not manipulation. Well, I've said no, it's OK, no problem. But if I say marry this babe, she'll make a Good Wife. But at the back of my mind, I know that it's because that girl is the daughter of chief so, so,

so and so. And if he marries her, then he'll be sure for me in business and in other things. Is that manipulation? My wife said OK, yeah, that's manipulation. So that's the best way I could explain it to her. Then scenario one, I'm just saying, my son, you deserve a Good Wife. Based on what I'm seeing, this babe, I think she's pure. She's correct. That's that's the wife for you. That one is just father talking to his son as per what is best for your life.

That is not manipulation. But then father talking to his son saying that look, you see, this babe is a very correct setup. If you marry this babe, you will be sure for us, her father is chief so, so, so and so or her father is connected to so, so, so and so. If we marry into this family, these are the opportunities that they will get for me and for you and for you can see now that that second one, that is manipulation.

So that's the best way I can explain it. If you still don't agree, then well, anyway, just know that there's a difference. It is not all trying to influence somebody or trying to exercise some influence on somebody that we call coercion. Now, the guy's message had an interesting call to action. He said save my number. Now it's his call to action to me. First of all, it's good that he has a call to action in his communications because lots of us, when we send out messages,

we don't even put a call to action there. And that is wrong. We should always have a call to action in our message because we always want the person that we're talking to, to take a particular action with us, either to further the sale or to further the relationship or to further the agenda. In this case, I'm assuming the guy, you know, wants me and him, you know, as in we should be cool, We should be chatting once in a while.

So save my number. Yeah, That's not a good call to action. The reason why I mention is because I'm getting lots of those messages where people are, you know, call to action in the end is save my number. Yeah, it would be nice if people save our number, but that is not a good call to action because that is a kind of call to action that benefits only you, who is the sender. And whenever people see a call to action that benefits the other party, only it reduces the chance that they are going to take action.

So when you're looking for calls to action, look for call to actions that benefit the other party or both of you. So in this case, if the guy had told me something like, you know, because I love your podcast, I'll be honored if you let me look at your copywriting needs and let's see how we can make your podcast more effective. You know, if you said something like that. Yeah, that kind of thing will catch my attention because he's asking me now, look, Bros, I

love your podcast and my skills is copywriting. I believe there's some value I can give to your business. So let's see how me as a copywriter, let's jam heads. Let me see how I can help you improve your podcast. Now that kind of angle, that kind of CTE, that kind of call to action is kind of, you know, make me or any other person be interested because the person is talking about things in terms of what I need, what I might be looking for.

So I don't know what kind of call to action will be the best, but I'm just trying to show you that this is how we should be thinking about it. A call to action that benefits the other person while at the very least benefits two of us. Any call to action that is benefiting only me, it means that the other people are not going to take action. But look at my own call to action at the podcast. I see if you have any questions,

reach out to me. I give the phone number. You can see that it benefits both of us. I might get some potential business out of it. I will get to deliver you some value. You will get some value out of the situation. So it is a mutual something. But if I give a call to action that is only me focused, yeah, then you guys are not going to take action. So The thing is, we can keep on saying more and more and more things about this message, but we have to keep this podcast at a manageable length because already it's like 35 minutes.

But the main thing that I wanted to pass across is this, yes, we should always talk about ourselves and we should always talk about our businesses, but we should look for ways to communicate that through the lens or through the world view of the other party. How is it going to benefit this other person? And am I talking in terms that this other person can understand? That is the right way to go about it. And with that, Zefini, we are done.

Whilst my younger brother likes to say chest finite, you know in our house we can't speak French so we just make up a bunch of stuff. Anyway, so that's all for today. Now remember if you have sales and marketing questions, then bring them to me. You can call, you can SMS, you can WhatsApp me on 08064662140. Thank you very much for your time and attention. I'll catch you, dear listener, at the next episode.