Building Businesses: The Priority of Courage Over Confidence

Hello and welcome to the show. People often talk about having confidence in business and a couple of days ago it got me wondering, is it confidence that they're actually talking about or is it courage? What does confidence mean? What does courage mean? What is the difference between the two? Is there any overlap? And what do you need in business, especially those people who are starting on business fresh? So that's what we're going to tackle today.

Now let's define courage. And remember on this podcast, whenever I'm defining anything, I'm just trying to use a simple everyday definition that every common man, every common woman can understand. So I'm not trying to be technically precise. So do not be bothered if you don't find whatever definitions I give in any dictionary or in any business book. I'm just trying to make things simple so that we can understand and so that we can apply.

Now courage. Courage is just the response to the feeling that I am scared and we all face that in every single aspect of our life. You know, whether you're getting married, having children, starting a business, you lose a loved 1, whatever it is, we all get to that point of I'm scared. I don't know what to do next. But most people are going to find courage because we're going to find a reason to go ahead. Maybe because at the end of the Crucible that we're passing through, we're going to achieve some worthy goals, we're going to get some good returns,

especially if this is a business endeavour. Or maybe we're going to grow throughout the whole process. So whenever people are in that situation of, oh, I'm scared, but they still find a reason to go ahead regardless, that is courage. In fact, it's something I've had to teach my boys because they don't quite get what courage means, because my older son in particular, whenever he hears courage, what he thinks is fearless.

And so I have to explain to him that no, being courage and being fearless are not the same thing. In fact, for people who lack the emotion of fear, it actually is a disease. And then my son asked me, how come we don't know any of the people who are fearless? And I say, OK, very good. This is the reason why it is a disease, because people who are born without fear, they actually die very young because they go and do a whole bunch of stupid stuff.

Because the reason why we have fear is fear preserves us and it stops us from going ahead, making a fool of ourselves, killing ourselves, doing something dangerous. So fear serves a very useful, it has a very useful value. So it's not a problem that you have fear. In fact, it is healthy and it is good that you have fear because if you have fear, it's going to keep you alive and it's going to stop you from making mistakes.

So being courage, sorry, being courageous is not the same thing as being fearless. So courage just acknowledges the fact that yes, I am scared, but I have to go on anyway. If you're running a business, you have to go on anyway even though you're scared. So you're negotiating something. Maybe you're used to dealing with 10s of thousands, hundreds of thousands. This is the first time that you're negotiating in the millions.

You have to get to that point eventually. So I need to find reasons to go ahead. That is what courage is. Now confidence, on the other hand, confidence means I can do this. Confidence comes from competence and confidence comes from doing. Which is why on the podcast I keep on stressing the fact that it's not just enough that you should tell somebody to go and be confident and then fake it till you make it. Like no, what you're asking is unrealistic.

If the person has not done anything, there is no reason for the person to be confident. Because confidence means I trust my abilities. If you're saying I trust my abilities, it means you must have done the damn thing in the 1st place. So this whole fake it, you make it Lamba. You guys just please forget that thing. Don't fake confidence. If you haven't done it, you have not done it. What you need is courage now. OK, I'm feeling a little scared,

but shy. Let me go ahead. This might be worthwhile. The returns might be worth it. I might grow through the process. What you need is courage. Stop trying to fake confidence. If you're trying to fake confidence, you are lying. Because confidence means I trust my abilities. I trust my abilities means I can do this. It means I have done this. So that is the reason why some of us can show up confidently on a podcast, or show up confidently live speaking, or show up confidently at a coaching session or show up confidently to try and help a client solve a problem.

It's not because I'm faking something till I make it. It is because I have done this. That is confidence. I trust my abilities because I have done this in the past. Confidence comes from competence and confidence comes from doing the damn thing. So start small. OK this is what I want to do. Before I go and throw 500,000 in to do something. Can I throw 20 K 1st and validate the idea and see that this thing will work? Oh oh after all the thing worked.

OK, next time maybe I can do 40K and then see what happens. Oh, it worked at 40K. OK, no problem. Maybe I can try 120 K. Confidence comes from competence. It comes from doing. You're getting bored because you trust yourself and your abilities. You see that? I did it at stage A and I did it at stage B. I'm confident it's going to work at stage C. So courage, confidence, not the same thing. Sometimes there's some overlap,

but a lot of times when people are talking about this whole fake it to your make it or go ahead and be confident, you are asking someone to go out and exercise the wrong thing. Let's be clear about our terms now, which do we need? Do we need courage or do we need confidence, especially when we're starting out in business. The answer is we need both because we're dealing with unknown and we're dealing with unforeseens and we're going to have fears.

So whether he's trying to figure out the ideal customer profile, who should we be chasing after, who are the best customers we should be running after? What is the most profitable market segment? What selling framework should we use? What marketing strategy should we use? What advertising channels and sales channels should we try out? Lots of decisions need to be made. We're dealing with unknowns. We're dealing with off, unseen,

unforeseen. So there will be fear. However, even though we need both, confidence comes first. Because in the early days, I'm scared. I've not done this before. I don't know what will work. I don't know which ways up from down or left, from right. But let me find reason to go ahead because we might achieve a worthwhile goal, the returns might be good, or I might grow as a person throughout all of this. So we need both, but courage comes first.

So many times when people say, because I see this thing on LinkedIn, especially when women are talking business things back and forth, Sorry, I'm not trying to pick on women. I'm just being honest here. Somebody will say I need more confidence. No, you do not need more confidence. If you have not done the damn thing, you have not done the thing. Don't go on manufacture confidence. What I actually mean is I need more courage because this is new territory.

This is uncharted territory for me. I don't know what lies around the corner. So let me find courage. It might be a worthy goal. The returns might be good. I might grow through all this. So let me take small steps, OK? I don't know what's at the end, but I can see this step and I can see the next step. You take another step, all these small victories that you get from exercising courage is what will lead to confidence.

So they eventually can present yourself and you can be a boss guy or be a bad ass boss chick because you found courage and took a small step. When you took the small step and things worked out, you validated the opportunity. You validated your belief in yourself and then the confidence came. So need no need to fake anything till you make it. Faking it till you make it is telling lies. Be of courage and be bold. Try and figure out the next step and then take the small step.

As you begin to walk 1234, the confidence will come. Stop trying to manufacture confidence. So in summary, what I'm trying to say is don't worry if you don't feel confident. It's OK. We all go through it. In fact, I'm going through some of those issues right now. Don't worry if you don't feel confident, just muster courage and you'll be fine. If you muster small courage, you can figure out the next step and you move forward.

Everything works good. You're on the path to building confidence because as it works, you will trust your ability. You will know that you are confident. You'll be bold. But The thing is, when it doesn't work, it is not a loss. At least now you will know from experience that this thing that I tried, no BM is not pure. The thing did not work. Or you know that, OK, I need to go and figure out a way to make this thing work.

So summary, that's just all I wanted to tackle today. What is courage? What is confidence? Courage just means I'm scared. But I'm going to find a reason to go ahead. It's absolutely necessary. Courage doesn't mean fearlessness. If you're fearless, you will lose plenty of money and you will lose your lives, which is one of the reasons why people who are born with that genetic defect where they have No Fear, they all die young.

Then confidence just means I can do this. I trust my abilities. I trust my abilities means I did it in the past. So I have reason to believe that I will do it again. So start small, get some easy wins, have the right expectations. You will start building the confidence. You need both of it because we're dealing with unforeseens and unknowns. However, courage comes first. As you do, the confidence will follow later. Stop faking it till you make it.

Find courage and start making it small, small, small. The courage will come eventually. Thank you very much for your time and attention. If you'd like to connect with me for a strategy session, a business audit, or you have some questions you'd like me to answer, the phone number is 08064662140. The country code is +234. For those of you who are not Nigerian, then also connect with me on LinkedIn. The name to look for is Tava Shima IED.

I have a YouTube channel of the same name. Thank you very much for your time and attention. I'll catch you guys with the next episode.