How to Spot High-Value Clients Without Being Rude

I have spoken a lot on the podcast about how to handle business conversations and selling conversations because lots of Nigerian business people don't realize that selling or trying to promote your business is not about how well you pitch. It's not about how well you toast, it's not about how well you manufacture a presentation, but it's about the quality of conversations that you have. And it's about the quality of questions that you ask.

Because First off, if you're having a conversation with someone and it is question LED, the other person gets a chance to talk about themselves. They are seen to be heard, they are seen to be regarded, they are seen to be understood. And this is the kind of thing that creates likability in a conversation because you can't just come into a personal situation or a business situation and then start talking about yourself all the time and then expect that you're going to make a good impression on people.

So the example that I give is the fellow who shows up to a networking session because you don't mentioned a long time ago when I signed up to Alumni UK and the Alumni UK is this initiative by the by the British government, by the UK government. And it's an association. It's an alumni association basically of everyone who has passed through a United Kingdom institution of higher learning. And OK, well, for those of us who join, it's good networking.

But make no mistake, from the point of view of the United Kingdom, the UK government, it's a way of promoting admissions in in the UK. Because if people who go to UK institutions have valuable, how will I put it now, valuable graduate networks or postgraduate networks, then lots of people will think, OK, it's a good idea to go to Auk University, you know, so that you can have access to these kinds of networks. You know, the sort of thing that these people do already in Niger.

And that is the, say, Harvard, Harvard Society of Nigeria or whatever it is that they're called, you know, all the people, all Nigerian people who went to Harvard, you know, they have their own small clique, their own small association. So if you attend enough of these institutions, I'm sorry, enough of these networking events, eventually you run into that guy who just won't shut up. The guy goes from place to place to place.

Usually it's a guy, sometimes it's a girl, but they just won't shut up. This is me. I'm the best, I'm the brightest. This is my area of research. I graduated first class and five multinationals are trying to hire me and they spend the whole evening just going from table to table, from person to person, saying the same thing. This is me. This is my business idea. I was the best in my class. I graduated first class. I have so much promise. 10

multinationals are trying to hire me. So if trying to advance business conversations, if trying to advance business agenda, political agenda, you know, whatever it is that you're trying to advance, it was all a matter of toasting, pitching and boasting. These are the kinds of individuals who you would think would be most successful, but actually they turn out to be pretty odious when you're in the room with them because they just won't shut up.

They just won't stop talking about themselves. So this is the wrong way to try to grow your business. This is the wrong way to try and do networking. This is the wrong way to try and advance your agenda. That's if you work as an employee and there's something in the department that you want to, you know, put on the table so that you know HOD, you know, so the head of department will back you and stuff like that. This is the wrong way to move your agenda.

And so because of that, one of the things I've been doing over here on the podcast is to talk about how whenever you're in a selling situation, a business situation, a whatever situation, so long as human beings are involved, you actually need to have a process for qualification and discovery. Now, qualification and discovery, for those of you who listened to the last episode, just means you're at the stage in the business conversation or at the stage in the business relationship where you're trying to figure out who is this person that I'm talking to?

Who are they, what they want, what are their needs? What are they aspiring to? What are they running away from? Is when you have a conversation on those terms that you're going to be able to figure out, this is what my product or my service can do for them. And if I'm going to make a sales pitch or if I'm going to try and make a proposal or a presentation or something, I should build it around these key terms. So having qualification and discovery, talking to people and trying to figure them out,

trying to figure the problem out, trying to figure the context out is the best way that you have for trying to sell your product or for trying to sell your service. So I talk about that ad nauseam on the podcast and I'm not going to stop because it's something that Nigerian business people and Nigerian business owners need to know, qualification and discovery. So essentially this is what we're going to be talking about today on the podcast.

Now I know that in the past I've spoken about it more from a very, what would I say, dry point of view. Maybe not, maybe not too many examples, but I was doing some cleaning, not cleaning per SE, you know, just going through my phone and then deleting stuff, throwing some old stuff. And I found a very old document, a client questionnaire that I used to use for qualification and discovery as a much younger wedding photographer.

So I'm a former lawyer, now turned business consultant. But in between I have done event photography, producing documentary videos, and then also being in a family export business with my brother. So I've done a bunch of things. So I found the qualification, a client questionnaire that I would use when I was at wedding shows, bridal shows, wedding shows, bridal shows, bridal events, you know, those sorts of things that would help me to do qualification and discovery.

When I was talking to potential customers, when I was talking to potential clients, potential brides and grooms that I was trying to corner so that they could be my client. I saw those a bunch of stuff that I used to talk to them about. So I figured, let's just be very, very practical. You know, I'm going to throw away the list because of course I don't need it anymore, but I'm sharing the list over here on the podcast would be a very good example for those of you who keep hearing me say qualification and discovery and you haven't seen or you haven't heard very concrete examples from me about how you know what the flavour of the conversation is supposed to be like.

So that's what we're going to do over here today. Now before we get into the meat of the matter, if you'd love to connect with me, you can call me, send me a text message or WhatsApp message on 08064662140. If you're interested in the business audit 15 minute sale audit, you can WhatsApp me on the same number 08064 662140. And if you'd like to join my WhatsApp channel, you can hit me up on the same number and I will hook you up.

So back to the meat of what we're doing today. This is just a set of sample questions that I used for qualification and discovery. And this is an old list, very old. So unfortunately, you know, based on when I created the note and stuff like that, I'm guessing that these are the sorts of things I used to use when talking to potential clients sometime after 2010. I'm not sure exactly when. Maybe this is like 2012, 2013 up until maybe like 2015.

Oh, first of all, I think to note when it comes to qualification and discovery or when it comes to conversation frameworks, conversation outlines, that's also another way I like to describe it because some people don't like the heavy technical terms. So I just say conversation framework or conversation outlines whenever you're coming up with a conversation outline. Well, first of all, there's no such thing as a perfect conversation outline.

There's no such thing as perfect qualification and discovery because number one, you change all the time. So your knowledge base changes, your experience changes, your confidence and level of comfort when dealing with strangers and being put in new situations, new context, you know that changes. And so because of that, the quality of the conversations that you have will change and the specific items that you have in your framework will change over time, you know, as you grow and as you improve and as you move into new circumstances.

So there's no such thing as perfect list and there's no such thing as a final list. So you will start with, let's say you're getting new into Business Today and you're starting off as an architect, for instance, or you're starting off in solar cells, or you're starting off as, I don't know, an environmental consultant or something. So all these three people have to do qualification and discovery. The architect needs to figure out the client.

Who is this client? What do they want? The building that they want to build? Is it residential? Is it a commercial? Is it industrial? What kind of project are they going to use it for? What kind of safety standards does it have to meet? What kind of occupational standards does it have to meet? You know, different things like that. The same thing with solar. Somebody wants to buy solar, What is it for? Is it for residential?

Is it for their house or is it commercial? Is it for a factory? Is it for, you know, what are their power requirements? How many machines with a power, How many TV's, How many ACS? Is this person a family man or a family woman? OK, So how many children, you know, if you're trying to power a house and the man has, you know, 5 wives and 30 children, you know, definitely they need a different kind of system than a fellow who's just married to,

you know, one wife, you know, the wife of his youth. And maybe they only have two kids. So it doesn't matter what kind of business you do, you will need to have a conversation framework, the conversation framework, a selling framework, A qualification and discovery framework, whatever framework, whatever guideline that you want to call it, but you will need it. But there won't be any perfect one because when you're a brand new architect, the list of questions that you have will be plenty because you know, you're scared, you're using this thing as a crutch.

So you're going to ask a whole lot of questions, but then over time with the experience, you'll be able to cite some people and decode on all two things. Or you'll be able to ask a question in such a way that you ask one thing and then the question will give you like four or five bits of information. So your list will always change. Now, the reason why I'm pointing this out is I don't want anybody to listen to this thing I said,

oh, this is my perfect recommendation for people who are in the wedding space or the event space. That is the ideal list of questions you have to ask at all. I'm not saying that. I'm not saying that at all. I'm not trying to show you that look as OK, I'm still a young man, but as a much younger man in 2010, 2012, 2015, these were the kinds of things that I used to say when I was talking to potential brides, talking to potential grooms, sorry, talking to brides and grooms who could be my potential client.

So I'm not saying that this is a perfect list and I'm not saying that you should model anything after this. I'm just trying to show you a couple of questions and to talk to you some of the rationale about why I was asking these sorts of questions, right? So applying these principles are going to be tricky. So if you need me to look at your own particular circumstance, that's not a problem. Remember, you can just connect with me.

You call me, send me a text message or WhatsApp message on 08064662140. If you're interested in the 15 minute sale audit or you want me to look over your business processes, it's not a problem. Call me, send me a text message or WhatsApp message on 08064662140. Or if you want to join my WhatsApp channel, hit me up on the same number and I'll hook you up. So the sample questions. Now, first of all, on my list, my questionnaire that I had was the bride's name, the bride's number, and the bride's e-mail.

Now let me point out one thing. If you listen to Brian Tracy's early stuff, psychology of selling the audio thing, the audio, the audio one, not the book. If I don't know why the book is different from the audio material, I don't know why, but if you listen to the audio one, there's a part where Brian Tracy talks about how creativity is required. Creativity is essential when it comes to selling you guys to be a creative individual to get that money.

The reason why I'm pointing this out is because because we're looking at the questionnaire or because we're looking at the framework or because we're looking at the checklist, some people just apply this thing in a very slavish manner 1234 like no creativity, no flair, no personality, no nothing. The checklist is there, the questionnaire is there, yes. So even if you didn't design it, Orga gave you questionnaire and Orga said go and sell no problem.

The fact that 456 of you are working from the same sheet does not mean you need to sound the same. You got to bring your own self into this thing. You see it in the way that is comfortable, that is sweet in your mouth. That's how you do this thing. That's how you do it and you be conversational. Now the reason I'm pointing this out is because because on the questionnaire that org I gave you for instance, the thing says bride's name, number and e-mail.

Some of you just hold the keyboard and then you now ask the babe, please, what's your name? She will say it, you know, say what's your phone number? She will say it should not, you know, say what's your e-mail? You say by the time you keep asking her questions like this in a robotic fashion, like, what do you expect? How did you be like, ah, like, come, I didn't come here for interview. Like I'm looking for a wedding photographer.

Do you do photography and video or not? I should go to X for you and reasonably so because you've turned this thing into a jam interview. What is your name? What is your phone number? What's your e-mail? That's not how you do it. On the checklist. You see name, you see phone number, you see e-mail. The way that you get this information is you keep it nice and conversational. So you hear her when I say here, you know, as in in Nigeria now greeting, you go greet them now.

So sister, what's up? How are you doing? Or however it is that suit your personality. Oh, good afternoon, welcome to my stand. You know, how can I help you today? Oh, congratulations. I noticed that you got proposed to recently. However it is you want to start the conversation, but eventually you get to the point where you say something like, oh, my name is Shukri. So your name is if that's who direct for you, you say, oh,

sorry, sister beg Novaks. I don't want to keep calling your sister all the time. You know what should I call you? Any which wisher you're trying to find a name in a conversational way. Somebody doesn't pick up the phone and call you and then you say what's your name? It's not like that or you're the networking event. You say, what's your name? Be conversational about this thing. So if on the checklist, there's bride's name, there's number,

there's e-mail, it's not you. You won't ask it as if it's an interview. There's no interrogation. You're not you're not a member of the police. You ask, you know, engaging conversation and as you're getting information, just the note I'm down. Now the way I have always put it is I always tell whoever it is that I'm talking to, like I beg Novix. I don't forget any of the things that we're talking about really important.

So I'll be making notes from time to time. I hope you don't mind. Since I've been doing this thing, nobody has ever told me no. Don't write anything down. I know for some of you sounds scary or maybe you sound too formal or about nobody has ever told me no. In fact, there's some situations where what I do is as person is talking and they say something, you know, I know my head, I say, and then I write it down. So I didn't ask for permission,

But the fact that I say, OK, you don't mean it, and then I write it down, they can tell that I'm trying to track with this conversation. Nobody has ever stopped me to say, Olga, put your barrel down. I beg. Listen to me as I'm talking to you. So don't worry. You can have your keyboard, you can have your paper, you can have your whatever. You know what? Just the SketchUp put something down. The reason why is because as you're talking to this potential customer now, later on, you, you know, you guys follow up with them or something.

How will you follow up with somebody when you don't have any background information on the person? Do you know how awkward it is after a bridal show? You want to call somebody? You only have the phone number, you didn't collect the bride's name. Are you going to start that conversation? How at least if you have the name and you remember some background information like you know how her fiance's name, her boyfriend's name and you know how they met.

You know you are noting us all those things you can call and say Ching here. How are you doing now? Of course she doesn't know who it is. Should be like, I'm fine. You know that all you understand, like she's answering, but she doesn't want to be rude. She doesn't want to come out and say who is this? And then that's why we say, oh, sorry, forgive me. I'm sure you probably don't remember. You know, this is the dude that you spoke to at last week,

brides and babies bridal affair. She'll say, OK, sorry, please don't be annoyed. I spoke to like 5 different photographers that day. I'm sorry, I can't remember you saying no, it's me, the Benway boy. And that's the reason why, you know, I talk about building rapport and that's the reason why I ask people, you know where they're from because no, how, no how if I say where are you from? One state. And luckily for me, my name is my name is different.

Well, at least most people think my name is unique. But The thing is, if you come to my states, you know, everybody has my name when in other parts of Niger, people think my name is unique. So I'm know how know how. I always ask that question. Oh, what does your name mean? Where are you from? Eventually the thing comes back to me. I said, oh, I'm thief. I'm from Ben Roy State. Oh, really? Tavishima, How do you pronounce your name?

Yeah, you tried Tavishima. You're sure it's not German? You're sure it's not this? You know, we always end up having that conversation and then I'll sleep in there. That, you know, I'm a binary boy that don't worry, I'm the first one you're meeting. You know, I'm sure you'll probably meet another one soon. And then conversation continues. So when I'm calling the follow up on the lady next time and she says OK, sorry, sorry.

Who's this? Oh sorry. Don't be annoyed. I spoke to 4 photographers that day. They say Oh yeah, it's OK, don't worry. I get that a lot that happens. My name is establishment. I'm the binary board. I spoke to say, oh, oh, Ben Ray boy, can you see from building rapport now conversation, they continue rapport, they flow. That's how you do it. You don't just hold your keyboard and say sister, your name or your phone number or e-mail.

No conversational because they're trying to build some rapport here, right? And then you throw in something like, oh, that by the way, how's, how's Shakudi? You know, because of course you'd have asked and you know that, you know, her fiance, her husband to be that name is Shukudi. So how's Shukudi? By the way, how's he doing? You know, rapport conversation, they move. So wasn't my questionnaire the bride's name, however, I won't do him.

I guys get the name. It doesn't have to be name and surname. If I have to keep things informal, I will just just go for first name. So first name, I put it down a phone number, collect it, e-mail address, I put it down. Although for me I used to privatize phone number. Because back then in 2010, 2012, 2013 people know they respond to e-mail not to talk of now 2026 even then e-mail address the frustrators like you will send e-mail to the bride die should not go respond you being spam.

So sorry, one moment. I will be back with you all shortly. OK, I'm back. Sorry about that. I should have mentioned I forgot, you know, the usual warning that I'm making today's recording at home and everybody's home and my wife needed my attention for something because she has to travel soon. She has to be in Lagos for work. So anyway, private stuff shop, but I'm back. So I think I had spoken about how I'd get the bride's name,

the bride's number, the e-mail address. And I think I had spoken about how you ought, you have to keep this thing conversational. It is not an interrogation. I think also spoke about how it's OK to ask people for permission. You say Bro Novaks or you know, Madam, if you don't mind, I'm just writing down a few things so I can stay on top of this conversation. Or, you know, you've been saying some very important details around ABCXYZ and I don't want to forget.

So like for those of you who are in the solar space, for instance, or who are selling technical installations, physical installations, you actually should be writing down these requirements. In fact, somebody can be looking at you and be saying this guy's an airhead because you are not writing down in the the requirements. So if you're working on, you know, installing some power plants on something, something, you know, it is part of the whole process.

You have to be doing the power audit. How many ceiling fans, how many dis, how many that, how many DB, how many circuit breaker? How many of these asking them questions need to confirm something before you may even need to calculate something and say, oh God, look, you said your machine is 2500 watts. But based on this and this and this, if my understanding is correct, actually we should be looking at a rating of 3800

watts. You know, you should be asking questions, you should be writing these things down, Then let's see what else? OK, well, I can't remember what else I mentioned, but from the point of view of those of you who are listening to the podcast, you know, you already heard everything anyway. So, yeah. So back to the context of wedding photography. So I would get the bride's name. I get her phone number. I get her e-mail.

Then of course, I would also get the groom's name as well because, you know, this is how we build rapport. You know, you get the people to talk about themselves, you know, So I also need to know the kind of person that the groom is because sometimes at these events, you'd be talking to the bride only. But, you know, on the wedding day now you'd have to coordinate both of them, coaching them through their photos, you know,

things like that. So it always helps if you had a little bit of background knowledge on the groom ahead of time. And in fact, I used to get their phone numbers so that I will call the guy. I say, you know, what's up? This is Chukudi. They say, yeah, who am I speaking with? So I spoke with your wife earlier. She came to social so bad event. I'm one of the wedding photographers that she's considering. And I thought it would be a good idea for me to reach out to you,

you know, just get acquainted, you know, won't be nice for the first time we're seen is on the wedding day, you know, be somehow now. So I just said, let me just reach out and say what's up, Goblet? Yeah, yeah, that's true. So what's up? Congratulations, man. So I'm sure you're excited. Say my brother would spend money anyhow, I say I understand that's how these things is. That's how it is. But don't worry, this they will come and pass in Jesus name, say Amen.

And then from there, conversation just the flow. Build up all the gang. Build up all the babe this I will be moving the, the, the relationship forward, the personal relationship. Could they move on forward one step at a time business relationship, would they move on forward one step at a time, one call at a time, 1 visitor time. That's the way forward. So the groom, I'll get his name from the bride, I'll get his number.

I also get his e-mail address. But again, my own personal personal preference is phone number. Anytime I need a phone number, that e-mail is just, you know, backup as per, you know, sometimes the bride will drop her phone number, but then you look at this and say what did this girl write? Did she write 5-6? I mean, did she write 55? You know, all those kind of things. So sometimes the e-mail address will be backup. You know, you never know.

Then of course, wedding date also need to get their wedding date because I have told you guys before that timelines and urgency are really, really important. If you're talking to somebody who is interested in your product or your service and it looks like they have a need, but they don't have any sense of urgency, they don't have any timeline. It doesn't matter how sweet the conversation with, I say with the conversation was, you don't have a deal on your hands because there is no sense of urgency.

There is nothing that you can point to objectively outside of both of you to show that this person is ready to take action anytime soon. Those of you who are listening to the podcast last week, you remember the time that I spoke about my friend, let's just call her other and I said, how far do you shoot weddings in the East? And then because she's my friend, I forgot I abandoned my process. I said finally the Lord has done it.

She started laughing because I've been teasing her. You know other you're a fine girl. When are you going to marry? There is no good. You're just in the market like this is no good. Now they suppose marry if I if I miss if I was not married, I for don't propose. You know, just used to tease her like that. So when she said, how far do you cover weddings, weddings in the East, I said, the Lord has done it. And then we laughed and then I

started, you know, asking her questions what she has planned about this that of course I asked her, who is the guy? I just like, I beg your just leave that matter and then we'll continue talking. But I didn't ask her when is the wedding date. So me another. We spoke for one hour. Then by the time we finished and I said no, but seriously, I thought though, like what's like, what's his name? Who's the guy? When am I going to meet him?

And he said, Oh no, he hasn't proposed yet. I felt like an idiot. I have spoken for 45 minutes, one hour. I did not ask some very, very simple questions, wedding date, dates and timelines. They give you a sense of urgency. You now know whether you have a deal or not. It doesn't matter how well I handle that conversation with other, the very fact that well, she's interested and well, there's a guy, but you know the guy never proposed.

She's just doing her research just in case. No matter how sweet the conversation was. Excuse me, I did not have a deal on my hands. I didn't. And there's the reason why in the beginning it's important that you have a process and you follow your process. So simple slip UPS like this. You didn't ask when his wedding date. You assume that you have a good deal because the person is the president's goddaughter or something and because they have money and blah blah blah, only to find out that she's just doing research or the guy proposed.

But because election is around the corner, the wedding is not going to be until after election. See, I'm currently making this broadcast recording now in April of 2026. Election is going to be in roughly a year's time, you know, into 2027. If she's the president goddaughter, yes, congratulate yourself that you're in the running because if you close this deal, the money will be good. The money will be sweet, sweet money.

But The thing is president's daughter-in-law. So because of that, everything will be based off election. And you know how these things are now. So the president's goddaughter, of course, be marrying Senate President something something, you know how they marry themselves now. So everything is based on election. So it doesn't matter how sweet the conversation we had today was now because nothing they happen until after election,

even the election itself until after inauguration. So you can have a sweet conversation with her today. But The thing is election is early on in the year. Inauguration will be around that kind like May 2930. So inauguration will be like May into May June Abbey like May into June inauguration all those everything before the families will now settle down to now start discussing the wedding date. So this thing about timelines very, very important.

You sell solar you by discussing installations. You just ask how soon do you want this up and running by simple. If the person starts dropping some days or some months that sounds favorable. You know that you have a deal on your hands. Oh, how soon would you like this up and running? I'm hoping that I should have found a solar vendor in over two months and just ask 02 months. Wow, that's very specific. How come? Is there any particular project you're going you're working towards?

You ask the person says, well, those are part of the things we showed our investors. We show our board, you know, to keep us on track for. So, you know, as the person is talking about the timeline, you are now getting a sense of how serious is this timeline. So you sell solar or you're selling other power things. You're not asking people how soon do you want this done by just simple question like that, just to test sense of urgency,

test timelines. You're not asking how the hell will you know if you have a correct deal or not. It's not just a matter of you're talking to somebody. The person's skin is smooth, the person talks well, and you know, the person drives a G wagon. It's not just that, yes, they have all the money and they look right, they sound right, but is there a sense of urgency? Do they have a timeline? What is that timeline? Find a way, figure it out.

Now this is wrong area that I was lucky or kind of spoiled because as a wedding photographer, you know, it's right there, the wedding date. So we didn't have to be too creative. You just ask them what's the wedding date? So if you sell something else, you know, you have to look for stylish ways of asking. So for solar asking them how soon would you like this done by? If you're an architect, you know, I guess how would you ask as an architect?

OK, I guess for an architect, if you wanted to get a sense of the timelines, maybe you'd have to tie it to the substantial thing on ground. So if the people that you're talking to are property developers and they want you to do to draw design for them for, you know, semi detached duplex something something that that's how all the houses in their state are going to be just asking them now as an ask eater, as an architect, just asking them now.

Oh, cool. OK, so when is groundbreaking ceremony? You see simple question like that. When is groundbreaking ceremony? We already been need to get some idea, some sense, you know, getting some sense of that timelines at least people serious or not. If you're saying when is groundbreaking ceremony, you're talking to them in 2026 and they're saying, well, we're thinking of green lighting the project sometime in 20-30. In your mind, you now know that OK, you know what, may I follow them?

The young let me continue talking to these people, but this is not a deal because I'm asking them in 2026. I say when it's groundbreaking ceremony and they're saying, well, we're thinking of something, something maybe 20-30. I mean, as in four years time. But as an architect now, especially as a young architect, you know, you just finished school, you know, body, they're hot, you need money, you need cash, you need good cash.

You're talking to somebody and you say, oh, when is ground breaking ceremony and they're saying that, ha, we just confirm from the governor, Governor say he's going to be available. He's going to be available February of 2027. Now you know you're dealing with somebody that's serious because this is March of sorry, this is April of 2026. The person is giving you for ground breaking ceremony, pest is giving you a date that is like 10 months ahead.

OK, good. Now since the ground breaking ceremony, the date is 10 months ahead. That means definitely you must have finished the designs for the building or for the factory, you know, the month before. Like you can now see that you have a sense of the timeline, how you can be planning yourself, the follow up where you would follow up, how you chase them, whether you go cross mark them or you give them space in your mind, you can begin to see everything you see.

So This is why I was saying that even though this is my qualification and discovery list as a wedding photographer, you can see that the principle is the same. No matter your field, the principle is the same. So of course, I would ask the bird what's the wedding date? If they haven't proposed to her, then now there's nothing there. You would have proposed to her and the wedding date is in four months time. Good, good, good, good.

Making progress. When the one thing that I figured out, anybody who reached out to me and the wedding date was one week, one week from the time we're talking or more, that is a bad sign. No, because we're for wedding photography. Anyway, you're talking to somebody. Now, what's today's date itself? So hold on. OK, 6th of April, you're talking to somebody 6th of April and then you say when is the wedding date? And then the lady says it's 13th of April.

Usually it's a bad sign because when the date is close, close like that, they're in a rush. They don't care. The only they just need somebody, anybody quick, quick, quick, quick, quick and usually the cheapest person. So those ones, I didn't like having that kind of conversation at all. Why is the person tell me that oh that their wedding date is next week was in two weeks or more? I just lose more heart because I know that this won't be a fight.

But anyway, trying to figure out wedding date. Then I would also ask questions about the style or theme of the wedding because you'd have to prepare yourself. And I put it like mentally you suppose prepare yourself, you suppose a gauge. And then of course, you discuss with your crew some of the ideas that you try for the photographs or for the video or for the kind of questions. So you ask about style or themes of the wedding, then what else?

OK, how do you want to feel on your wedding day? That's something that is particular to those of us in the event space then let me see. So around money, I had some stylistic ways that I tried to bring up the money conversation. And one of them was around this thing of DIY that's do it yourself. I don't know about now, but back then, you know, 20101215, you know, there was this thing in Niger, this DIY culture was there.

You know, somebody insists that they want to handle some things themselves. And whenever you're with a DIY bride is either they are incredibly sophisticated, meaning, you know, they have taste so they want to close mark some things or they are incredibly broke. So they're trying to, you understand, trying to save money. So that's why they want to do some things themselves. So there was something in my checklist, you know, and asked that, Oh, OK, so are you guys ADIY couple?

They say are you a do it yourself couple? Sorry, what does that mean? Like are you going to let the plan the wedding planner handle everything or there's some things you want to do yourself? We'll say oh, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. Actually my auntie's a very good cook. So my auntie's going to handle the this and this person will handle the that as the bride is talking in my mind. And I was like, OK, this is this is a person with the money conscious.

So I now know that OK, this money conversation go hard. So you know, things like that. So those are some ways that I used to stylishly ask about the money thing. So asking are you a do it yourself DIY couple? That was just me really. I was just trying to find out how how they are when it comes to money. So for your own product, for your own service, you need to try and figure out ways to ask the money conversations. Then another question that I

used to use to try and figure out money, but also because it was a practical question as per our logistics, was I'd ask about the house, I'd ask about the hotel and ask about the church and ask about the reception, I'd ask about all the venues. So it's a very practical question because you know there'll be lots of running around 'cause you know you start from the house, then you move to the church. You need to know how far away the church is so you can plan your movement.

So back then for some, if the events are too far, I'll just if the venues are too far, I'll just hire a driver for that day so that, you know, movement can be fast, you know, just come outside again inside the car, the driver just drives while he's looking for a place to park. And I just jump down, move to the next venue. You understand? So I ask those questions just so that I know how plan my movement. So you ask them.

Oh, OK, you're getting dressed in Popsy's house. OK cool. Where's Popsy's house? OK, I'll meet summer. Cool. Then from there, the hotel. Where's the hotel? Oh, OK, Hotel Maitama. OK, the church. OK, it's the Catholic Church in Maitama. Oh, OK, right, no problem. Then where is the reception? Oh, the reception is our dunes in Maitama. Oh, OK, cool, cool, cool. So in my mind now I now know one thing that OK running around won't be too harsh on that day because everything they the same local governments, you know the same local.

So movements go not too poor us, you know moving around to be OK. But then like I said was the way that used to kind of cheat and see whether they have money. If you say our father's house is in Metama, the hotel Metama is upscale part in Abuja. So if her father's house is in Metama, the hotel is in Metama. They're using dunes that has helipad. Abby doesn't have a helipad. Abby has a swimming pools anyway, but she's mentioning all those places.

I will now know that OK, I'm talking to some people that have cereals bar. So therefore we might be able to make a good one on this wedding. So this is how I used one of the ways I used to cheat to talk about money. Now I'm much more direct when it comes to the money thing. I ask people straight up, how much have you budgeted for this? Well, I tell them straight up now look for what the things I've talked about so far executing this kind of project could cost anything between this and anything between that, you know, is this something you budgeted for?

So now I just ask directly, but back then this, I used to cheat. Are you a DIY couple? I'm cheating. I'm trying to see whether their hand is AKA GOM. They don't like spending money or yeah, we're at the venues. So this was a way to cheat. Now I also asked questions about the wedding party. When we say wedding party, we just mean the number of people that are going to be there, you know, number of bridesmaids, groomsmates with our grandma is coming, grandfather.

We're again mother of the groom, mother of the bride, you know, maid of honor, bridesmaids, flower girl, ring bearer. OK, that was also another way of me cheating because the bigger the wedding party, sometimes, you know, the more money these people have, you understand? So I know some of you will be laughing or you're not impressed. I was asking how stylishly trying to figure out how much money these people have. But look, it's something, it is important.

You need to know people can afford your product or service before you continue to invest time in them. It's not as if people that don't have money are now worthy of your time and attention. It's just that there's no point in spending one month building relationship with someone only for the person to say you're too expensive. If anything is going to die because of money, it's best to kill it within two or three days. Talk to the person on Monday.

By Wednesday, people will decide that OK, now Monday is going to be an issue, then end it. Instead of you talk to somebody on the 1st of January, you're doing relationship building, you're bouncing around issues. Then on February 28th, the person now tells you that, oh, I don't have money and believe me, I've been in that situation before. The fact that I felt like an idiot. I felt like an idiot. I won't lie, I really felt like an idiot for showing somebody three months.

Then they now say that you know you're too expensive. Anyway, I was angry at them. I was angry at myself. I said I'm ICOSA, I should have brought up the money thing earlier. So yeah, about the wedding party. Oh, then also it had some implications on how many people would need to to shoot. If we're if we need, if we're having a very large bridal party, then we might need some assistance, you know, second shooters, somebody to hold the light stands, you know, and stuff like that.

So these are also questions that things that you should be mindful of in your qualification and in your discovery process. You're trying to figure out what is the scope of the job, What are the factors of the job that are going to affect affect your manpower, How many people you need, how much equipment you need, how much resources you need, how much raw materials that you need. You see, this is the reason why I say do not issue a quote unless you've done qualification and discovery because now you have all the information that you need so that you can give a valid quote.

Because it sucks to tell somebody that look Bros your money now 2.5. Then when you start going forward, you now realize that oh, if this is going to be profitable, I should have collected 3.6. It really sucks to have those sorts of conversations. So in the qualification and discovery process, you should be asking these questions early. Sorry, 1 moment. I'll be back. OK, Sorry about that. I am back. And yes, you guess right.

Was my wife again. She named my attention for something. By the way, if you're a young man, this is the reason why it's nice to marry a woman that loves you because you know she loves you. You know she would feel you, if you understand what I'm saying. All right, So, OK, I think I spoke about. Yeah, I think I stopped on the size of wedding party as a wedding photographer because I was trying to figure out stylishly figure out how much money they have.

Also, I was also trying to figure out the aspects, the different aspects of the event that will determine how I can give an accurate cost. Because I guess on weddings we, because it's a small something, you can shoot it by yourself no problem. Just you, no problem. But there's some weddings, excuse me, because some weddings are huge. You will need, you will need boys, like four or five boys, you know, 2 of you at the bride's place, two of you at the groom's place.

Then maybe somebody will be at the event ahead of time, maybe like two people, They have one person stationed that red carpet to be capturing all the dignitaries that are coming. You know, President, Governor, you know, Deputy Speaker, somebody permanent like that. So you ask all these questions because if maybe because it's the president's goddaughter, you know, out of the top of your head, you just call the biggest number you can think of.

Maybe you say 25,000,000 and they agree and then they transfer 20 million. First they said we give you the balance of 5 million at the end. But then by the time you start looking at everything, number of days that you should go on different venues and maybe the traditional now for instance, OK, Tinibu is a Lugosha, so maybe the traditional will be in Lagos. You know, you didn't, you didn't factor in cost of flight, cost of hotel, all those things.

By the time you now calculate everything you say, oh boy, if I don't charge them, like 40 M down is too late. Is somehow you now look unprofessional and you have to go back because you know how you do this thing. If at the end of the day, now 40 M, you need now 40 M. It's just that you be a very, you look like a very unserious somebody to go back to start saying, sister, you know, you know, we agreed on 25, but you know, based on logistics, based on this, based on that, you know, we have to go up to 40.

You now see me somehow. So have a proper qualification and discovery process and thrash out all these things early so that by the time you give them a quote, your quote is 11 is 1. Your quote has accounted for everything. You know how many cameras you need? You know how many boys you need? That's what events. You know how many photo books you're making. If it is solar, you know, how many panels you need, how many rooftops you're covering, how many batteries you need, what kind of battery, whether lithium or this or this or that or that.

Also, one moment. Yeah, my attention is needed. I'll be back. OK. Sorry about that. I'm back. This time was my boys. You know, like I said, holidays are on and they'll be making friends with some of the neighborhood kids. And anyway, you know, now when boys are playing, definitely do 1 issue another. So where was I? OK, no, I think I was talking about how qualification and discovery is really important because it gives you the information that you need so you can make an accurate quote.

Very good. Then another question I used to ask as a young as a younger, because I'm silly young man. I'm silly fine boy. I used to ask about family challenges because after a while I realized that sometimes you step into some kind dynamics because of this wedding. I remember now we noticed that all the bridesmaids, all of them, all of them do coalesce one side and those one particular bride maid that like she was always on her own, like they didn't really like her.

And I was trying to, you know, for the purpose of picture. Now you suppose how I put it like if you take picture and then like everybody clearly make one click one side, then one click is in another side, you'll be somehow you know, because when you are an event live and people they form clicks. You know, it's not a problem because clicks form and then clicks dissolve. But The thing is a photograph is is is is permanent.

So when you take a picture like that, you know those that click is frozen in time. So I was trying to get her to blend with the group. But then later on now I overheard some people talking and I realized what was going on because what happened was the girls epoxy, you know now the Niger we do so polygamy know you know Omar matter. So the bride and her friends, all of them one side, but then the other wife now the younger wife on the bridal train that was her daughter.

The second wife wanted her daughter to be on the bridal train by force by force. You know the quarrel the whole team was shot as a no problem should be on the bridal train. But that was now the awkward situation. The bride and her friends were forming clique on their own and of course they didn't want nothing to do with the other one because he's the other woman's daughter. And of course the other girl knew that. Look, nobody even wants me herself this wedding.

I didn't even want to come for this wedding. I have my own barrels. They forced me by force. By force. Which can politics be this? You should have just left me in my own life. So after a while I started asking people beforehand so I know what it is that I'm stepping to. But of course, I didn't used to just come out and say the popsy married to wife, no, or the popsy have children outside. No. I just used to bring it up conversationally, just talking about their family.

But I was just trying to figure out, you know, are the parents divorced? Do they have step siblings? Or I'll ask about these relatives because sometimes it's a nice idea to, you know, maybe, you know, Popsy don't die. Might not be a bad idea to honour Popsy during the ceremony and if that thing kind of thing is going to happen as a photo crew and as a video crew, you want to be aware so you capture all those kind of things.

So yeah, it's ask those sorts of questions, but not that I was carrying a keyboard and asking them, you know, the policy. Enter Bush. You know, just see our children outside. No, just conversational, just try and figure things out. Especially since even myself, you know, my whole family, you know, we get those kind of issues. So as even good self as a world building rapport that Oh, really? Even you, my sister, that's ABO

like even me to even in my family, we get this kind of issue too and they will just laugh and then you bond over the whole thing. So yeah, things about like that. Oh, then also back then I used to ask them, how did you hear about us? That's me and my whole crew. That's me. I used to handle photos. My brothers used to handle videos. My brother-in-law used to do editing. Known as a bunch of other guys. One guy was a drone pilot, you know and you know sharp.

So how do you hear about us now? The reason why I used to ask that one is just so I know about marketing like which one is working? What do you need to double down on? So you know, if somebody says Instagram, if you talk to 50 breads, 49 of them say they saw you on Instagram. You now know that OK, this year, I guess double down on Instagram. I need to run more Instagram ads, you know things like that. So how do you hear about us?

So this is not an exhaustive list, but other things. So, but back in 2010, 2013, 2015, these are the sorts of things that I was asking my potential clients about, my potential customers about. And from some of the issues that we've spoken about now stemming from these questions, I hope you guys can see why you need to have this thing as a process that you do every single time. Because if you don't follow it, you'll miss out on some important information.

Your quote will not be reliable. You won't have all the information that you need to do an effective job, and you will not have opportunities for building rapport. Because the more you get people talking about themselves, the more they like you, the more they feel you, the more they trust you and the more they talk, the more it gives you opportunities to build rapport. So if somebody says, Oh yeah, his name is Chukudi, we met back when we're in uni.

So we should you go to say I want to University of Aberdeen. So for real, You want University of Aberdeen? I went to Aberdeen as well. So are you serious? I didn't see your face. When did you graduate? Oh, I left there in 2008, 2009, OK. Where did you go? Oh, I went then 2020. So OK, that means you guys are on the Youngish. And then I say, well, yeah, actually, yeah, we're quite young. I'm 20 days, he's 20. You see conversation, they flow because she was talking about herself.

We now is that uncovered an element of commonality that we both went to the same uni. So get people talking is not about showing up and saying I'm the best, I'm the brightest, I'm the cheapest, I'm the fastest, I'm the this, I'm the this, I'm the that, no. So after getting all this information in my qualification and discovery process, my next step was after this sweet convo, all this conversation, I will try and call the person after the bread of her and I will try and set a meeting so that they can come to my studio and look at sample albums.

Because back then my darling wife, she really designed my studio was real nice. I had mirrors in my studio from the top all the way to the bottom. At first I thought was excessive but my wife said #1 to create illusional space. At least your studio is small, but with this mirror studio look big. I didn't understand. But when I saw it, I say, wow, OK, OK, I see what I I see it makes sense. And the Maher also said plus women like to look at themselves in the full length mirror.

I say, yeah, OK. And she said it, it came to pass. So last part of the design of my studio mirrors from ceiling all the way to the floor. Then we also had plush carpeting, like blue or so. Yeah, blue carpeting, then wooden shelves. Sorry. One moment I will be right back. OK, I'm back. And don't worry, this is going to be the last time. So this time was the kids. My younger son got into a misunderstanding, let's just put it that way, with one of the other children.

So where was I? OK, so I was saying now that all these questions that I was asking these potential clients of mine, you know, the brides, sometimes the groom when the groom is there, but even if the groom is there, the process will be the same, you know, and I'll get the information for the bride and I'll reach out to the girl eventually. Because in my opinion, both parties who are integral to making the choice, so always liked to be in touch with both the bride and the groom to try and close the deal.

That way if there are multiple parties who are required to close the deal, make sure that you're in touch with us, many of them as possible. So excuse me. So I believe I was saying that all this information that I was gathering on the cover, I wasn't gathering you just for gathering sake. I was gathering this information because it would help me to give an accurate quote. It will give me opportunities to build rapport.

Also, I didn't just stop here. So it's not just about gathering information after the bread affair, after the bridal Expo, whenever it is that we got, we got introduced, I would try to book a meeting so that they would come to my studio. And the whole point of them coming to the studio was just we needed a much more quiet environment so that we can talk. Because the problem with bridal Expos or any kind of business Expo like Abuja Trade Fair,

Lagos Trade Fair, you know, Nassau Agricultural Expo or whatever, the problem is that these places are allowed. There are lots of other vendors there. Everybody's trying to do business. There are four or five DJs playing music. You can't really have good conversations with people. So this is where you get the in depth conversation. And then if you want to show people samples and start discussing particular proposals, you need a nice quiet, calm atmosphere that you control.

Maybe we can have a conversation even if you can't control it, but share maybe like you're going to the office. No problem, so long as it's a nice cool, quiet, calm atmosphere where you can have your conversation and start going in depth. So it was when I was not on the bridal floor, but it was now in my studio that I would now try to get them to look at albums. Have a look at this album. This one is glossy. This one is Matt.

Which one do you like? OK, this one is 100 pages. This one is about 50 something pages. Which one do you like? This one is wooden cover. This one is padded leather cover. Which one do you like? You see, we're now presenting specific options. We're not looking at specific features. I'm trying to gain their feedback. They are buying all the different features that I'm showing them because you know, this ultimately is what is going to determine what I showed a couple.

Because lots of you make the mistake of somebody shows up, you now start giving them presentation given their proposal based on what you like, not be like that because like in the wedding photography space. Now for instance, one of my guys Shogun. In fact that's his real name Shogun. That's how the guy to pedo one of my deals, I was talking to one of the babes and she wanted back then they used to call it a synthetic.

Now I didn't like synthetic because I thought synthetic was cheap. I the look was cheap. Shogun also thought the look was cheap. But you know, I know that is not about me. She said that's what she likes No problem. That's what she likes is even good ma because the production cost was actually lower. So that means I'll make a higher profit margin on it. She had decided that that's what she wanted Oliver, she going to now show up later on like babe,

now this one you want that No, now this thing is kind of cheap. Now be what do you think that's how the debate begin. The second guess. That's when she realized what he had done. Then after the baby left the meeting, she was started apologizing. Say guy, I beg. No vets, let me fuck up. I know. Say let me fuck up. I beg. No Vex, no Vex. But anyway, doubt had been introduced, so it's not about you. You don't want to show somebody something based on what you you like.

That's not how it works. It's not based on what you like. It's based on what they like. When it comes to solar, for instance, you might think that lithium is the best thing since sliced bread. But if somebody says that lithium isn't no new technology, you say yes, it's the newest on the market. That person says I don't trust anything. You give me old battery. It's not about you. You have told the person the pros and the cons.

You are giving the person. You show the person here. You show the person B. The person say version A is the new one. I don't like anything new. Give me something that is old. Give them the thing that is old. Build them accordingly. That is your presentation, that is your proposal. So it's not based on you. So that is also part of the reason why we're doing all this grammar, all these questions. It's just so that when the time comes, if you're an architect,

the house that you design is the kind of house that they like. If you're in the solar space, the kind of installation, the kind of setup that you propose that you issue invoice for them is the kind of one that they're looking for. If you're in the photography and video space, you know the video, the film that you shoot, the, the photo that you shoot, the book that you design, the wedding video that you edit is according to their tastes.

Because all these questions that we've been asking, how do you want to feel your wedding day? How did you guys meet? How you introduced, Oh, tell me more about the groom, blah, blah. What's the style of your wedding love? You know all these things. You will now know how it is that you edit because honestly speaking, yes, wedding videos, wedding video, but the way that you will edit the video for a redeemed chick is not the same way that you shoot the video for let's say house on the rock House on the rock babe.

It's different. It's very, very different the way that you will shoot and edit photos or videos for a Yoruba or 1 bear, you know person, you know how they can be. Now it's not the same that you shoot a photo and video for let's say she comes from, you know, one of these tribes in the in the middle birth, like some of these tribes in Plateau states that are very conservative. Maybe they go to Aqua church, they go to cooking, cooking church.

You know, the way you shoot an Aqua cocaine wedding, the way you do their video is not the same way that you do a what's up, what's up, Yoruba Owambe, you know, jump up and down kind of wedding. So this is the reason why you ask all these kinds of questions. The next step is to sit somebody down and start looking at specific proposals. And you're making a proposal or a presentation or an offer or whatever it is based on all the information that you've gotten so far.

After that, you have to start discussing pricing and specific options based on all these convo. And of course, for those who've been listening for any length of time, you know that my recommendation is always put 3 proposals on the table. OK, Mummy. Olga, Sister Brother. Based on what we discussed, this option A option B Option C Option A These are the advantage. Option B, this is the advantage. Option C this is the advantage.

Option A is this amount. B This amount C this amount. So which are you interested in? Interested in which one catches your fancy? Which one reflects A realistic budget for you? You know, whichever we shall put the options on the table and then you stay in the pocket, stay in the game, and then you see how you can advance the conversation forward. Now, the reason why I say 3 proposals is because if you only have one proposal on the table,

the answer is either yes or no. Let me think about it. Yes is good, no is also good because it means they're not interested. Let me think about it. No down is bad. That's a bad answer. But The thing is, we're trying to stay in the conversation. So give yourself options. Don't just make one proposal, you know, make 3. So that's it for today because I think I've spoken about a lot. So if you've gotten value from the episode and you'd love to connect with me, you can call me, send me a text message or a WhatsApp message on 08064662140.

If you're interested in the 15 minute sale audit or to audit any of your business processes, you can WhatsApp me on the same number 0806466 2140 and you can join my WhatsApp channel by just sending me a WhatsApp message on the same number and I will hook you up. So thank you very much for your time and attention. Sorry for the multiple interruptions and sorry for the very, excuse me, very long episode today. So make sure the next episode is shorter and hopefully quieter with less interruptions.

So I'll catch you all some other time.